The final issue has long since been done and dusted. I believe you can still buy back issues for cheap over here. It’s about time I reprinted the following, taken from – yes – issue 46.
The Final Revenge of….Everett True
Ok, so clearly you have memorised (at least) one piece of ridiculous hyperbole regarding yrself. Please quote your favourite here.
“I always liked Mia Clarke’s line about Careless Talk Costs Lives: ‘It’ll take years for Everett and Steve [Gullick] to realise what they achieved’. I’m always very down on whatever I’m doing at any given point because that’s how I motivate myself. I’m crap. I need to do better. Balance the above with a friend’s recent comment that I’m the ‘most self-obsessed and least self-aware’ person she’s ever known.”
What is the biggest misconception about you?
“That I enjoy all the attention still being given to a persona that I created over 20 years ago.”
The most over-used adjective(s) about what you do?
“I’m supposed to be arrogant. I’m supposed to be inspirational. I’m supposed to be famous.”
What word never gets used that should?
“Fragile.”
What concept or detail is always missed?
“That often I know what I’m talking about… for example, Australian music critics were up in arms last year because I pointed out that free music titles don’t need to be in thrall to their advertisers, that it’s possible to take a pride in the magazine you create, that it’s possible to view criticism as art as architecting. Back came the cry: ‘Totally naïve, he doesn’t understand the reality of the situation’. Yes I do. I totally understand that you’re all too scared or lazy or otherwise occupied to address the situation.”
What was the most heinous lie you ever told in an interview? Were there any repercussions?
“Jennifer Finch [L7] beat me up in a back alley in LA after I reported on how her band liked to masturbate in the shower – and I’m not even sure that was a lie. I conducted an interview with Teenage Fanclub that was so dull that in the finished article I had Norman Blake reciting the British Rail timetable instead. I claimed Courtney Love had talent… the repercussions are still being felt.”
What was your worst interview experience?
“Worst interview, hands down, was with Ice Cube – conducted at the height of Riot Grrrl, and starting with me questioning him about misogyny in his lyrics. Or, same era, myself and Melody Maker critic Sally Margaret Joy talking to PJ Harvey and agreeing beforehand that we shouldn’t mention the ‘f’ word, particularly in the context of her posing nude for the NME the week before. First minute in, I’m like, ‘so Polly… you don’t consider yourself a feminist then?’ Her PR claimed that she suffered a nervous breakdown the day after (the incident later inspired a Hole song). There was an inebriated escapade with New Model Army where the singer – quite rightly – took me to task for my drunkenness. ‘I’d never drink before I got on stage, that’s totally unprofessional,’ quoth he. ‘Maybe that’s why you’re so fucking boring,’ quoth I.”
Do you think yr music criticism ever helped improve anyone’s work?
“I wish.”
If you were to do all this over, and be a music magazine editor again, who would you feature and why? Who would you put on the cover?
“Any band that kicking_k recommends. Man, that dude rocks some when it comes to tapping into my tastes – Micachu, Dirty Projectors, Prinzhorn Dance School, Italians Do It Better, Mitten…”
What do you do when a band you don’t like cite you as an influence?
“Whine.”
Do you ever Google yourself? What’s the weirdest experience resulting from this?
“I have a Google Alert set up that seems to have stopped working since The Guardian and Village Voice cancelled my blogs in the same week. I’ve featured in some fairly insane fan/slasher fiction – in a three-way with Brian Molko, a sexual tryst with Blur. I particularly enjoyed the 20,000-word dissertation that was centred around my exploits at MM. I hope the student passed!”
What’s yr favourite of the ‘media projects’/interviews/magazines you’ve been involved in and why? What does it, y’know, say about you?
“Without a shadow of a doubt, Careless Talk Costs Lives and Plan B Magazine – seriously, I feel humbled that so many inspirational and creative people have chosen to work with me. What does it say about me? FUCKING DIY RULES MY ASS! I also enjoy performing on stage as ‘The Legend!’, for the same reasons.”
What brilliant (at the time) ideas regarding ‘direction’ or presentation or whatever are you now glad you never followed?
“Big ‘Al’ McGee wanted to turn me into the Mary Chain minutes before the Mary Chain themselves came along… I’m glad that never worked out.”
Are there any territories where you’ve never had any success? Where? Why d’you think this is the case? Where are you biggest, geographically?
“No one knows who I am, anywhere.”
What’s the most actually fairly insane thing a reader has done to get yr attention?
“Sleep with me.”
What’s the worst question you’ve ever been asked? What was your answer?
“‘So what was Kurt Cobain actually, y’know, um, like?’ My answer: ‘Why don’t you ask someone who actually, y’know, um, knew him?’”
